This week was a historic one for tiny, adorable African-American gymnasts and repulsive homophobes everywhere! It was also a decent one for us here at Progressive Boink. Here's what we did:
Etaurnity: The Latest In Centaur-Themed Young Adult Supernatural Fiction. Bill brought us the next big trend in young adult supernatural romance fiction, complete with the sparkling prose that has become the hallmark of the genre. "Below his navel was another chest, but a horse's chest, rather than a man's."
The 9 Questions Answered By 'The Net.' Jon did the world a great service and finally answered the nine burning questions we have all had about the information superhighway since The Net came out in 1995.
Exclusive: Jonah Lehrer's Resignation Letter From The New Yorker. "Kyle scooped every other media outlet in the country by getting his hands on Jonah Lehrer's resignation from The New Yorker." - John Lennon
Building The Ultimate Paul Giamatti Film. Bill cracked Hollywood's most closely guarded formula, detailing the necessary components of any Paul Giamatti movie. The Problem With Phil hits your local "arthouse" theater, which really just shows The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel for two months straight, in December 2013.
Lunch Judgment: Tell Us About The Lunch You Had Or Are Having Today. Jon judged you all for your shitty meal choices. Remember that guy who ate an apple on the toilet? That was great.
The Top 10 Olympic Nations' Flags Most Clearly Designed By Middle Schoolers. Kyle listed obviously middle-schooler-designed flags of actual sovereign nations (for the most part) that you can actually see at any point in the next week just by turning on your TV. Remember the AK-47 on Mozambique's flag? Can't wait for the U.S. to add the BFG 9000 to Ol' Glory.
Make Time For An Old Friend: NetworkTVOnline.info. Jon creeped us all out again by showing us a website that somehow became sentient but then evidently suffered brain damage in a threshing accident.
AFL: The 10 Least Prestigious Films Of (Porn) Actress Allie Sin. B ran down a totally not depressing list of super good life choices. Read it or die of scurvy!