Boss of the Carpenters
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"They're all worthless, I
tell you!!"
Male
Kakariko Village, HYRULE
Last Login:
2/22/2005 |
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| Contacting Boss
of the Carpenters |
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| Boss of the
Carpenters's Interests |
| General
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Judging
the worth of a man by his ability to make, finish, and repair wooden objects and
structures. |
| Music
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Bruce
Springsteen of the Carpenters. |
| Movies
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I
thought the direction on John Carpenter's Vampires was lazy!! |
| Television
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I
loved Cordelia on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel." |
| Books
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"The
Very Efficient Carpenter: Basic Framing for Walking on Residential Construction Like a
Balance Beam (For Pros, By Pros Series)" by Larry Haun |
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| Boss of the
Carpenters's Details |
| Status: |
Hired to improve a village
who's greatest two attributes are a huge tower in mid-town and a lady who can't keep her
chickens in a coop and won't do anything about it herself. |
| Here
for: |
Standing under a big tree
and telling passerbys about the shitty job I'm doing. |
| Orientation: |
I've hammered my fair
share. |
| Sign: |
Boss of the Capricorn |
| Hammer
/ Nail: |
Yes / Yes |
| Children: |
I only get to see him at
night, and all he ever has to say is that everyone's disgusting. |
| Occupation: |
okay I've been waiting to
get to this one coss of the barpenters
CRAP |
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Boss of the Carpenters is in your extended network
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| Boss of the Carpenters's
Latest Blog Entries |
| I was just thinking today about how much I
needed a poacher's saw. In fact, I need a poacher's saw so badly that I would be
willing to trade this large, broken sword handle that I've assumedly been carrying around
this whole time for one! ( Add Comment ) This
afternoon we were contracted to fix the bridge in Gerudo Valley. At first I was
hesitant because it's a community of theives and Arabic women who keep swinging scimitars
in my face and throw me in jail every time I move. It's no big deal though, 'cause
all of their prison cells have exit holes. The guard who caught me the first time
was SO HOT. I pitched a tent! Here's a pic.
I wanted to take this as a group photo, but my worthless carpentry team was also
captured and can't figure out how to crawl out of a hole the size of their bodies.
( Add Comment )
Today Shiro, Jiro, and Ichiro handed in their request sheets for the new tools I'm
ordering. Ichiro wanted a double-handled saw, but all he ever gets is singles.
( Add Comment )
I think I just figured something out:
1. Whenever someone says my name it comes out red.
2. I am a carpenter
3. My son is also a carpenter but wanders around instead of working.
I think I might be God! Or at least the father of Jesus. Wait, do we even
have Jesus here? ( Add Comment )
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| Boss of the
Carpenters's Blurbs |
About me:
I am the boss of the carpenters that Impa hired to improve
this village and make it into a true city! But young men these days don't have any
ambition... Do you know what I mean, kid? My workers are just running aimlessly
around the village. and they're not making any progress at all... Even my own son
doesn't have a job. and he just wanders around all day! They're all worthless,
I tell you!! |
Who I'd like to meet:
Why do Cucco, suddenly appear? Every time. I stab one repeatedly. Just
like me, they long to be, close to you. |
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| Boss
of the Carpenters's Friend Space |
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| Boss of the
Carpenters's Friends Comments |
| Displaying 3 of 3
comments |
Weird Egg
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Feb 21, 2025 11:00 PM
Puh-puh-puh-POACHER'S SAW?Oh my medication!! |
Ichiro
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Feb 20, 2025 8:04 AM
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Link
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Feb 17, 2025 1:55 PM
All right! Another excuse to
scale Death Mountain. Oh well, having rocks fall on my head for twenty minutes is a
small price to pay for hanging out with Biggoron and making jokes about how Al Bundy used
to masturbate to him. |
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| Add Comment |
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