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Mayor Haggar!
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Why Visit Metro City?
The People.Metro City residents are among the friendliest you'll ever meet. They are always willing to lend a helping hand to those in need, and they do it all with a smile.
 Note to Sheryl: This photo is unacceptable. This does not reinforce the positive image we are trying to promote. Replace this with an image of happy citizens -- we need to see smiles and joyfulness. I have made a quick example to illustrate what we need; get Tina to find or shoot a photo similar and replace. Be sure to delete old photo and this note before uploading.
The Places.Metro City comes alive after dark, with over 8,000 clubs, discos and all-night libraries to entertain the night owl in you. The world-famous Crate Club serves drinks until 9:00 AM, and the spacious concrete floor leaves plent of room for squatting, sitting, standing still, and general loitering. Doors open at 8 PM, though that's more or less figurative because the doors fell off some time ago.
 It's rumored that none other than Andy Warhol once visited this very club. He said "This place is a shithole," then left. Perhaps some of that star magic will rub off on you! If standing around isn't your thing, try your hand at the Dick Room.
 We're not exactly sure what's in there. We're not sure we want to know.
The Sights.Metro City offers a seemingly infinite number of sights to dazzle and awe you. The city plays host to an array of landmarks you won't see anywhere else in the world, such as
The Statue of Libert.. uh.. Libertarianism.
 The World Trade Cent..rifuge.
 And of course, the open air sexy bathroom.
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