Gary Johnson (former Marketing Analyst - R&D; #32) Well, at the time I held an entry-level position as a marketing data analyst. We were performing a lot of those "man-on-the-street" taste tests in an attempt to reconnect with our target demographic; human beings. It was my job to analyze the film at the end of each testing cycle in an attempt to locate any consistancy or pattern which could then be utilized by our "research" teams to "develop" new products. When I got the call for the promotion, I was under the impression that all my hard work and company dedication had paid off. It was quickly made implicitly clear to me that this was in no way related to my job performance, and that while I may have ultimately won the position, I was chosen through some elaborate game of "Guess Who?" The only management criteria I'd managed to meet were not having a beard, being bald, wearing glasses and having blue eyes. I was slightly dejected, yeah, but still eager to prove my worth as an employee. I was then told to "fix the problem." I inquired as to which problem I'd been assigned to fix, to which I was told that the gun may have been jumped, but that somebody would be around shortly with a hat from which I was expected to draw a problem out of. It was all very exciting, but very confusing. |