Progressive Boink

[David]

the simpsons are going to

[Alex]

Oh they both look awful. Marmaduke lives up to the awfulness of its source material and will basically be the same movie that Garfield was with an ethnic sidekick, but Furry Vengeance has an annoying environmental theme with obnoxious children and piss and shit jokes, Ken Jeong and a title that sounds like a hostile 4chan takeover.

[David]

I would argue that Marmaduke actually looks, and I can't believe I'm saying this, worse than its source material. Like I said earlier, a Marmaduke movie should essentially be Beethoven 2010 which would be unenjoyable but fine. They have chosen to make a bad idea worse but giving a dog mischevious scamp attitude, sunglasses and the ability to talk. That's not even what Marmaduke is which is.

[Alex]

If someone were to eat the movies Beverly Hills Chihuahua, Garfield, and Scooby Doo, Marmaduke would be the resultant shit.

[DGMacphee]

I would argue that Marmaduke actually looks, and I can't believe I'm saying this, worse than its source material. Like I said earlier, a Marmaduke movie should essentially be Beethoven 2010 which would be unenjoyable but fine. They have chosen to make a bad idea worse but giving a dog mischevious scamp attitude, sunglasses and the ability to talk. That's not even what Marmaduke is which is.

And this is why I think people are unfair to Garfield and Cathy because I think Marmaduke is the fucking worst comic. At least Garfield has a plethora of joke patterns (jon sucks, mmm lasagna, kick odie, i hate mondays) and Cathy has either "i can't fit in my bathing suit" or "CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE CHOCOLATE AAAACK", but 95 per cent of Marmaduke jokes boil down to "Marmaduke does something annoying".

[Rusty Cooledge]

At least Garfield has a plethora of joke patterns (jon sucks, mmm lasagna, kick odie, i hate mondays)

And lest we forget whats on tv, coffee is awesome, irmas diner, visiting the vet, harassing the guard dog, garfield is old, friendly to mice, and mmm sleeping.

I own like 30 Garfield compilation books from my childhood.

[Bismark]

Marmaduke didn't even talk in his comic, right? He was just a klutzy pain in the ass. So this kind of went off on it's own to find more awful for itself.

[DGMacphee]

No, Marmaduke doesn't speak in the comic. All he does is wacky things (either something anthropomorphic or something that demonstrates how huge he is) that usually annoys humans. But the thing is the stuff he does is pretty tame compared to other dogs. Beethoven at least was a goddamn slobbery mess who'd destory shit; Marmaduke just kind of makes people lives inconvenient for a few seconds. And a lot of the times the people in the comic just get pissed at him for no good reason:



Why is she getting pissed at Marmaduke?? Why anger instead of shock at her dog being able to use a telescope despite the lack of opposable thumbs?

The art is pretty shitty too. Look at the guy's face in this one:



(unless of course, Marmaduke's owner had a stroke, then I feel a little guilty bringing attention to it)

But if you need any of the "jokes" in the comics explained, best to read this: http://www.29-95.com/time-suck/comic-st ... -explained

[DGMacphee]

I did some more research and now I really do think the owner had a stroke, or at least some botched surgery that left him disfigured, like Ebert. Observe:

[Hirsby]

Vegas odds on Owen Wilson attempting suicide again in the wake of the Marmaduke movie: 6-to-1

[AudeSapere]

PBoink's Derrida-esque deconstruction of Marmaduke is approximately 100x funnier than the comic itself.

[DGMacphee]

PBoink's Derrida-esque deconstruction of Marmaduke is approximately 100x funnier than the comic itself.

Who wrote it and why do I not remember it??

[Mally]

But if you need any of the "jokes" in the comics explained, best to read this: http://www.29-95.com/time-suck/comic-st ... -explained

Holy shit, the comments actually make Marmaduke fu--fu---funny???

Noooo!

Now I just need to find a website that lampoons Family Circus and I'll be thrilled.

[tmbg13]

Now I just need to find a website that lampoons Family Circus and I'll be thrilled.

You mean like this?

[DGMacphee]

Or if you're an old fart like me, you might remember this:

http://dfc.furr.org/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dysfunctio ... ily_Circus

[Wat]

also there is this