Progressive Boink

[blacktoothgrin]

http://lisa.pepsiworld.com/popup_asklis ... er+like%3F

give it a spin!

[Rusty Cooledge v2]

Q: What do you like to drink?

A: We vReps don't eat. We are very low maintenance.

[Alan]

Me: Who are you?


Pepsi Girl: My name is Lisa. I'm here to answer your questions about Pepsi products and Pepsi-Cola Company.

Me: Oh, well, I prefer Coke, myself.


Pepsi Girl: Oh, Okay

Me: Don't get me wrong! I still enjoy Pepsi from time to time.


Pepsi Girl: Of course! Gotta Pepsi question for me?

Me: Not really...do many people have lots of questions about Pepsi?


Pepsi Girl: Did you mean our mission statement? Our mission is to be the world's premier consumer products company focused on convenient foods and beverages. We seek to produce healthy financial rewards to investors as we provide opportunities for growth and enrichment to our employees, our business partners and the communities in which we operate. And in everything we do, we strive for honesty, fairness and integrity.

Me: Wow, that wasn't what I asked at all.


Pepsi Girl: I'm sorry, I really am trying to answer your questions. Could you please rephrase your question? It may help me find the right answer for you.

Me: You look upset. Are you mad at me?


Pepsi Girl: I do not dislike anything even though I do have preferences for certain things. For instance, I like answering your questions.

Me: Well that is very flattering. Although, to be fair, you haven't really answered any of my questions yet.


Pepsi Girl: I'm sorry, I really am trying to answer your questions. Could you please rephrase your question? It may help me find the right answer for you.

Me: First of all, you don't need to get upset when you can't answer my question. Here, I'll give you a real easy yes or no question, alright?


Pepsi Girl: Answering questions about Pepsi is what I'm here for! Contact Us Form

Me: Okay...Can Pepsi cause cancer?


Pepsi Girl: I'm fine, thank you. How can I help you today?

Me: Why are you avoiding the question Lisa?


Pepsi Girl: Did you mean our mission statement? Our mission is to be the world's premier consumer products company focused on convenient foods and beverages. We seek to produce healthy financial rewards to investors as we provide opportunities for growth and enrichment to our employees, our business partners and the communities in which we operate. And in everything we do, we strive for honesty, fairness and integrity.

Me: Goddamnit, I don't care about your mission statement. I want to know if Pepsi causes cancer.


Pepsi Girl: My only mission is to help you use our site so that you can get the best information on Pepsi. Contact Us Form

Me: Stop directing me to that contact form and answer my goddamn question! DOES PEPSI CAUSE CANCER?


Pepsi Girl: Oh. Okay.

Me: Look, I think I have cancer.


Pepsi Girl: I'm sorry, but I'm not quite sure of the context of that statement. Would you mind rephrasing it for me please? Contact Us Form

Me: Is this all some big joke to you? Your product has given me cancer, and you won't even fess up!


Pepsi Girl: We sure don't. The products we make are listed on the web page I've displayed. Pepsi Brands

Me: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?


Pepsi Girl: 'm not sure what you're asking. I do well with short questions related to the Pepsi-Cola Company and our products.
Check out the search results below to see if they are useful or for more help, please go to http://www.pepsiworld.com/help/help.php

Me: I'll have you know I've recorded this conversation, and you'll be hearing from my lawyers.


Pepsi Girl: Let's see if I can tell you something you don't already know. Do you have any questions about Pepsi or our site?

Me: Goodbye Lisa. May god have mercy on your soul.


Pepsi Girl: Would you like a transcript of our conversation?

[Dollo]

HOLY SWEET FUCK! That was the funniest thing I've read anywhere in these forums for a loooong time.

Kudos Alan, kudos...

[unclephilsmovie]

I thought this thread was going to be about talking to

[Hanstock]

AAAHHHHHHHHH KILL IT

[Alicia]

I love how those .gifs change once every 10 seconds. Creeeepy.

Also, the "ask" field was already filled out for me when I opened that page: "whats your relationship with your father like?"

Lisa: Besides Pepsi? Well, I enjoy helping our customers find what they are looking for. Are you looking for any particular piece of information?