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Lindy
What a Fool Believes
Joined: 09 Aug 2025
Posts: 948
Location: down by the water
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 12:21 am
Post subject: 12/13 An update? You're kidding! |
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do you realize we updated
This week brings us three new articles about a movie about disease, gay men in dresses and screaming children.
Emily continues with part two of her very funny review of Stephen King's "The Stand" which I'm sure I'll be complaining about how part three is not written yet because I'm excited to see it.
B and Justin have surprised us with an early Christmas Treat! Nothing says Christmas than a mall Santa and a crying child. hey did you know that santas are perverts they are like michael jackson who is a white woman
And finally, I've put up my fourth article about something I probably know too much about: Drag Queens!
So read, enjoy, comment and get yerself ready for the upcoming holidays. Make sure your trees are trimmed and your driedels are dried because we have a special surprise for next week! _________________ shrieking raccoon on a jetpack |
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SundownMotel
horrifically mind numbing
Joined: 09 Nov 2025
Posts: 1109
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 12:28 am
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Yay yay yay.
/rushes off to begin reading. _________________ And this is a promise, because this is true. This is real. This is Straight Edge.
| GataGoomba wrote: |
| Feast upon my precious torso coin |
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endlessmike
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 461
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 1:45 am
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i am enjoying this week's updates quite a bit!
| Emily wrote: |
| (which is so odd to me. Like, the entire country is ten minutes from death. How many of them are thinking, "damn, I need to hit Meijer for some ramen and light bulbs"?) |
and "grade A sex face" were some of my Thomas Haden Church moments for the stand
| Lindy wrote: |
| I'm usually forgiving to all kinds of drag queens, but this one really looks like your ugly guy friend who lost a bet. |
also sort of like patrick swayze in to wong foo, thanks for everything julie newmar
| Justin and B wrote: |
The kids in this picture don't look scared so much as perplexed as to how this man continues to function on even the most basic of human levels.
Here we see Lucifer, fallen angel and lord of the underworld, assuming the role of a mall Santa. |
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Mike
The king of pop
Joined: 09 Aug 2025
Posts: 1674
Location: Weird NJ
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 4:35 am
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We seriously need to find a version of that Pac-man hat that'll fit B now.
Also,
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| Two-year old (24 month old hey look i'm a shitty parent) |
_________________
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SundownMotel
horrifically mind numbing
Joined: 09 Nov 2025
Posts: 1109
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 12:38 pm
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Lindy's article was seriously awesome. I used to work with a woman who looked like an uglier, scarier version of the lady whose hair looks like it's made out of fiber optics. It was at the Olive Garden. Also, Lindy stole my Aslan joke, but I'll forgive her because she's the most awesomest and because Lindy=Best!!11 wait that is not accurate
I was reading B and Justin's article and starting laughing so hard at the combination of "Meet me in Montauk" and "Disney's the Kid," that I had tears running down my face and my lips were clenched and quivering, and I had a sound emanating from me that sounded like Ernie having an asthma attack. So since I'm at work, I'll have to come back to that one later, once I've had a chance to settle myself. More thoughts on this and Emily's article to follow. _________________ And this is a promise, because this is true. This is real. This is Straight Edge.
| GataGoomba wrote: |
| Feast upon my precious torso coin |
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mreow
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 341
Location: Reno, NV
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 2:18 pm
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heh!
| Quote: |
| the silent man's version of a "'Sup baby?" |
I love The Stand thing and can't wait for the next part.
Those mall santas are scary. |
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Mike Marksman
CUP OF WATER
Joined: 01 Dec 2025
Posts: 11
Location: The frozen wastelands of central NY
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 5:13 pm
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Well, there goes studying for finals. Although I put off reading this week's update in public places, as to avoid questions as to why I was looking at pictures of drag queens or scared children, all of the articles were what I would consider "non-stop laugh riots." It seemed that every few lines put a sparkle in my eye as I got a joke referencing something, even though I probably missed more than I got. Thanks for making the semester-end drudgeries of college tolerable with another good update.
Also, I don't know if this is the right place to write this, but I still laugh at "Progressive Boink: The Free Encyclopedia". |
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Mike
The king of pop
Joined: 09 Aug 2025
Posts: 1674
Location: Weird NJ
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 6:19 pm
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Good to see someone caught that. _________________
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Kirbyoto
DIET SODER POP
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 1478
Location: Pfft
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 6:49 pm
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Especially with that whole "Wikipedia taking your article off the site" thing.
You should host it on P-Boi. That'd learn 'em. _________________
WHAT IS WRONG WITH U WOMAN????? |
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Josh
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 383
Location: Donna, TX
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Posted:
Wed Dec 14, 2025 9:52 pm
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I thought it was funny too. Pay attention to meeee.
Every one of those Mall Santas were funny but my favorite was with the kid wearing the FBI shirt. He totally has the face and hair of a federal agent. _________________ Jon and Justin are smooth criminals and you have been struck by them |
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William
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 411
Location: Mississauga, Ontario, Canada
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Posted:
Thu Dec 15, 2025 12:25 am
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TELL HIM WHERE THE GIFTS ARE OR I SWEAR TO GOD HE WILL KILL YOU _________________ Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the shit out of little kids. |
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Molly
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 19 Aug 2025
Posts: 172
Location: Oregano
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Posted:
Thu Dec 15, 2025 12:57 am
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| The devil Santa pic -- I've seen that one before, but I'd never noticed the horns. So when you pointed them out... omg. I know the kids in many of the pictures look petrified, but that little boy and girl in that one make me laugh the hardest. And then to see the horns... crap... I laughed for a solid minute and injured something internally. |
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SundownMotel
horrifically mind numbing
Joined: 09 Nov 2025
Posts: 1109
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Posted:
Thu Dec 15, 2025 11:40 am
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Meet me in Montauk. _________________ And this is a promise, because this is true. This is real. This is Straight Edge.
| GataGoomba wrote: |
| Feast upon my precious torso coin |
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danielle-ish
CUP OF WATER
Joined: 12 Aug 2025
Posts: 78
Location: New England, where it snows and then it doesn't.
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Posted:
Thu Dec 15, 2025 5:41 pm
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whoa, acid freakoooout!
Funny funny things all around. _________________ NO WIRE HANGERS!!!!!!! |
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Rogue
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR

Joined: 25 Nov 2025
Posts: 145
Location: Location, Location
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 11:54 am
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| Kabuki Claus just plain freaked me out. Even more than the drag queens did. And I'm including the first dragster that looks like me in a wig plus about 30 pounds. |
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Kirbyoto
DIET SODER POP
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 1478
Location: Pfft
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 12:22 pm
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| Justin and B wrote: |
| Did you ever see "Scanners?" Yeah, Santa's head is full of garland. He, Santa, will KNOCK YOU ALL DOWN! |
"No one touches my 8-year-old children!! HANNUKAH WARRIORS?? You Christmas-hating fools." _________________
WHAT IS WRONG WITH U WOMAN????? |
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Bismark
DIET SODER POP
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 1639
Location: ...blue?
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 3:53 pm
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| Emily wrote: |
| Larry is played by Adam Storke. Who is Adam Storke, you ask? I have no idea. I have never seen this guy in ANYTHING else, before or since. |
I'm the same as Emily in that, I love the book and thusly convinced myself that I loved this bad, bad movie. So, I've wondered from time to time what ever happened to this guy. Last night, I got my answer.
| imdb.com wrote: |
| "Crossing Jordan" playing "John Soriano" in episode: "Family Ties" (episode # 2.11) 13 January 2026 |
I saw this episode last night. He was awful. I laughed out loud twice. It's his voice. He looks like he should be this tough, cool, Mickey Rourke character, but then he gets this nasally voice that you would almost swear is dubbed in.
And the first one of you fuckers that asks what I was doing watching "Crossing Jordan" gets suplexed into a caldera. _________________
| Quote: |
| I don't even know where to begin as a director to say "okay, now make the firetruck land on these guys." |
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K-Funk All-Star
CUP OF WATER W/ A SPRINKLE OF SUGAR
Joined: 10 Aug 2025
Posts: 292
Location: A box under the stairs
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 4:47 pm
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Great update all around this week. I especially loved Lindy's article this week.
I was just in Cleveland like two weeks ago, for my little brother's graduation from Ohio Technical College, and I SWEAR I saw the fiber optic-haired lady at the Slovenian restaurant where the grad ceremony was. _________________
| SeacrestDSV wrote: |
| If you want to vote for Kellie Pickler, JESUS CHRIST make someone take the telephone away from you, you should be ashamed of yourself. |
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Lindy
What a Fool Believes
Joined: 09 Aug 2025
Posts: 948
Location: down by the water
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 4:52 pm
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Out of curiousity, which restaurant?
A lot of the ladies here tend to look like men. I've found that in my travels throughout the US that Cleveland is one of the ugliest of the major cities. _________________ shrieking raccoon on a jetpack |
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DGMacphee
CUP OF WATER W/ A HANDFUL OF SUGAR
Joined: 09 Aug 2025
Posts: 979
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Posted:
Fri Dec 16, 2025 5:59 pm
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Fuckin' eBaum. _________________ A suitable ending, I think! |
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