awkward situations

[Daniel]

As if you've never done the same kind of thing.
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them's jokes, boy

[Justin]

But he goes to the school so by default he's got every right to be in the dining hall whether he likes the food being served or not.
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[quote="Bismark"]Didn't you know? Having uncontrollable shits is wicked scene.[/quote]

[Blind Jack]

[Adam]

[Randy]

This thread has become an awkward situation.
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[endlessmike]

[Ragingape]

[Adam]

Here's one:

There's a website on which you can order food from a variety of local restaurants. I was in the mood for a chicken steak, so I ordered one from what I would later find out is one of the worst restaurants ever.

Anyway, I put my order on my student account, so when it arrived, I would have to sign a receipt like I would for any credit or debit card. When the delivery guy showed up, we had the following dialogue:

"Hey Adam, I just need you to sign this here."
"Uh, yeah, sure, you got a pen?"
"No. I'll see you later."

And he just turned and left. I was amazed. Before he got out the door, however, he turned and said to me, "So, did you want to give a tip or anything?"

I didn't really know what to say, so I just went with "Yeah, I guess like 2 or 3 bucks."
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[webber]

[meursault]

webber knows it.

you know you take certain routes in the hallway, even if its completely out of the way, solely to see that girl - even if you don't know her. i know i did.
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the whole world is waiting to see when you fall.
sound the fucking alarm.

[Dollo]

^
Seconded.


Anyhow, moving on...So yesterday I call my IT guy cause i have him working on something for me - oh, and he's jewish:

"Hey Moise, how are things going"
"Good good, we're working out the kinks that the doctors were having yesterday"
"Fantastic. Hey, so, inregards to that other project - Im still waiting on that Final Soultion?"
"...."

Yeah, it was kind of weird for a second.
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No one Ever Really Dies.

[Bismark]

To jump back again to the reigning champ of the thread, I thought ctoner's article was very sweet, and I'm pretty surprised that any woman that read it would feel anything close to "terrified" sound slike bullshit. The douchebag that said something to him went so far out of his way to be a complete asshole about it, that I'd say there was a good chance that what he said came from himself only, and he was angry about it and blew things out of proportion a bit to make his point.

ctoner obeyed all of the "fair" rules of having a crush, like incessantly visiting her workplace (which he DOES have a valid reason to go to), and hopeless daydreaming. He didn't go into any dangerous territory, like waiting for her to leave work or leaving notes for her under her windshield wiper or anything.

I'd love to know if she even knew anything about what this guy said to you, because I sincerely doubt that anything you did would earn you the rep that he handed to you.
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[DJ Jazzy Jeff]

It's possible. I thought his story was sweet, but sometimes crushes like that can be real turn-offs. If she did have a boyfriend, she could have thought that cutting ties was letting him off easy instead of leading him on. If she was single and was just creeped out, then hiring someone to pretend to be the S.O. is old hat. I think most girls I know have used that trick to fend off unwanted attention.
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Like hot naked chicks? Click here.

[B]

And the truth is that most girls are complete assholes.
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[Adam]

[Blind Jack]

My second cousin is 45, married, has three kids and two grandkids. She got good and drunk while she was here, and came on to me, my brother, and my step-dad Matt.

That's fucking awkward.
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Nothing stops Eddie Guerrero.
Nothing stops him. He is fire.

[Bismark]

And the truth is that most people are complete assholes when it comes to being responsible about their feelings and the feelings of others.

Happy now?
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[Adam]

So a couple years ago, my mother's mother's mother died. We all went to my mom's cousin's house to sit shiva. I got to see all the family member my mom doesn't talk to, ever. And now I know the reasons.

Among other things, her cousin came up to me and said "You know, it's a shame I'm so much older than you and that we're related so closely, because you're really cute." I think I was 16, and she was in her late 40's. Blind Jack, hear, hear!
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[joshua]

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[Justin]

My friend Bill and I work together. It isn't uncommon for us to hang out after our shifts end to watch movies or go out to a bar or something. So one day a few weeks back I was getting ready to take off and asked him if he'd feel like doing anything later that night. He said yes and just told me to give him a call whenever I felt like hanging out.

This is where things got awkward.

You know how at everyone's job there's that one really weird kid nobody likes for whatever reason? He may be a huge nerd or smell wicked bad or whatever, and even though you might not get along with other people you work with you can always bond with them over how much that one kid sucks? Yeah, well, at our work his name is Matt.

So I say goodbye to Bill and tell him that I'll call him and am about to leave when I hear Matt ask out loud "when am I getting my phonecall?" I stopped in my tracks, turned around, cast a glance at Bill who was sort of looking down with his hand on the back of his neck, and slowly made my way to the door. Right before I go to open the door I hear Bill go "Yeah... you're cool to like, cover my shifts, but we're probably not going to be hanging out ever..." since Matt was STILL waiting for one of us to answer him. I clasped my hand over my mouth and ran outside.

30 of the most awkward seconds of my life.

Boiskov: Oh man, your awkward moment's the worst
Keasbey Mornings: So bad
Boiskov: I'm not sure what I would have done, were I Bill.
Keasbey Mornings: He calls up this girl we work with, Trish, and goes "Hey Trish. It's Matt. Soemone from work likes you"
Keasbey Mornings: And she's at work at the time, so I'm standing right next to her.
Keasbey Mornings: She goes "who... Justin?" and looks over at me
Keasbey Mornings: And he goes "What? No, me."
Boiskov: Smooth.
Keasbey Mornings: And she just says "Ohhhh, uhhhh. Yeah." and hangs up
Boiskov: Haha
Keasbey Mornings: This is a few days after he'd asked to 'score a spliff' off of her
Boiskov: If I were her I'd probably have his ass reported or something
Boiskov: Anything to make him go away
Keasbey Mornings: The grossest thing ever was when he scratched his head this one time and a fucking spider fell out of it
Boiskov: Hahahah
Boiskov: Christ
Boiskov: How old is this guy?
Keasbey Mornings: 22
Keasbey Mornings: It was slow one night and a few of us were talking about ex-girlfriends, and just generally crazy girls we'd known. And this kid Tom goes, "what about you Matt? Got any good stories?" and his response was "I've never had a girlfriend. I'm still a virgin."
Keasbey Mornings: That was awkward
Keasbey Mornings: Because like, the entire time he was laughing with us and going "yep! yep!" whenever someone woudl make a point
Boiskov: hahaha
Boiskov: Well I guess he gets a little bit of respect from me for being honest about it
Keasbey Mornings: Still awkward
Boiskov: Oh, absolutely.
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[quote="Bismark"]Didn't you know? Having uncontrollable shits is wicked scene.[/quote]