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atta_boy: Gentlemen, we have a problem. We're seven games back of teh Cardinals with two months to play. Fourth place. |
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atta_boy: Koskie, Weeks, and Vince Perkins are all down. We've benched Jenkins. That means more time for Hart and Gross, but we still have holes to fill. |
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BowLegged: THE BREW CREW HAS BECOME THE WHEW CREW |
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atta_boy: Right, and trading Carlos Lee away to the Rangers hurts us as well. So I've decided to bring back an old fan favorite to help us WIN again. |
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ChartAChild: Oh shit, is Robin Yount gonna play again? Molitor? Uh, Greg Vaughn? |
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BowLegged: BILLY JO ROBIDOUX |
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ChristmasShouse: Are you trading for Gary Sheffield? Sweet, Gary Sheffield! |
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BowLegged: DAN PLESAC |
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atta_boy: No, in fact you're all wrong! The newest (oldest, lol) Brewer is none other than STAN, aka "Mr. 3000!" |
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BernieHammer: ah gah ma sissa kids |
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atta_boy: Stan was forced into retirement just before getting his 3000th hit, and although he's not in his prime I feel he can help us close the gap on Albert Pujols and the like. |
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BowLegged: WHAT |
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ChristmasShouse: no offense boss but we really could've used an infielder or an outfielder or a catcher or pitcher or additional coach, or possibly even more fans or people working concession instead of... |
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BernieHammer: ya hear that amur'ca, they sayin bernie mac ain play baseball no more, THEY SAY bernie mac ain got what it takes.. /shakes head, licks lips
...AMUR'CA... i'm on whip em kids |
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ChartAChild: How is he supposed to help the team? |
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BowLegged: YEAH HIS EYEBALLS AREN'T EVEN POINTING IN THE SAME DIRECTION WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THAT |
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atta_boy: This man is an ORIGINAL King of Comedy. An ORIGINAL. Watch! |
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BernieHammer: i on unnastan em kids
heres a song yall might rumember /plays Solid Gold Soul hit from circa 1975 that no white person has ever heard; audience goes wild
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ChartAChild: I'm sorry, I'm not buying it. We're in a pennant race, I mean we could've gotten- |
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T-Rex: Yeah, 'ass right! Old Man ain't GOOD ENOUGH to play no more! T-REX is the new superstar of baseball! |
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BowLegged: YEAH LISTEN TO T-REX HE IS THE DOMINANT FORCE IN BASEBALL ENTERTAINMENT |
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BowLegged: WAIT WHO THE HECK IS T-REX |
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T-Rex: I was also in the movie! /makes you flinch |
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BowLegged: FLINCHHHH |
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atta_boy: Now that Stan is back on the team, I'm considering bringing up Rickie "Wild Thing" Vaughn for the bullpen. |
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ChartAChild: oh my god what is going on |
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atta_boy: lol i don't know everybody on this team druuuuuuunkkk |
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BowLegged: /PUTS LAMPSHADE ON HEAD |
