MeTrain: my turn? um aight

/stands up

ahem

MeTrain: bust out the vodka from here ta kamchatka, i'm a unseal a rusty tin a glasnost on ya ass

MeTrain: i sincerely wanted an tried ta preserve my nations system a govament but wit my words not my fist, my heart be pumpin communist but ya cant save a state wit a flick a ya wrist, don't playa hate i aint a capitalist

fuck all yall i'm a tear down this wall

HanleyDavidson: ooh uh
/snaps fingers
uh uh
/snaps fingers

MeTrain: /pours ketchup on head

my head all fucked up i got a tattoo a souf korea on my dome or some shit

HelmsDeep: Gorbachev! You're Mikhail Gorbachev!

MeTrain: f'real

HelmsDeep: OK, my turn.

/tilts cap to the side

HelmsDeep: uhhhh ok I, uh

I like rap music!

HelmsDeep: /turns off light

hey everybody look at me!

MeTrain: helmboy ya sposed to me aint ya

MeTrain: charade the train and ya charade ya brain

PECOTA: ¡YAH!

MeTrain: yo slim this a private clubhouse

state ya name an ya game

PECOTA: I AM THE PECOTA, MYSTICAL PROTECTORATE OF BASEBALL'S INNOCENCE

PECOTA: YOU ARE PURE OF HEART!, AND SO I HAD TO SEEK YOU OUT TO IMPART TO YOU A WARNING!!!

MeTrain: wait we still playin charades?

you sposed ta be the label on my gat damn mattress

PECOTA: THE JEFFREY LORIA! THE MAN WHO RULES YOUR FRANCHISE!, IS THE SAME MAN WHO DOOMED MONTREAL TO AN EXISTENCE OF BASEBALL-LESS PURGATORY

PECOTA: HE NOW PLOTS TO DOOM THIS FRANCHISE AND MOVE IT ELSEWHERE. EVEN NOW HE MOVES TO TERMINATE! YOUR MANAGER

MeTrain: nah man he can't go, me an joe like girardi an cola

PECOTA: TAKE HEED! OF HIS ARROGANCE! PLANT FIRMLY YOUR MARLINS' FINS IN THE FLORIDA SOIL. ALLOW THE LORIA NO MORE GROUND!!!

MeTrain: aight then little bill its been real meetin ya

fLORIdA: Willis! Get away from that man. He's nothing but trouble!

PECOTA: HELLO, NEWMAN

MeTrain: ssssss awwww ya just got clownt by a mystic

fLORIdA: /flustered

DAMN YOU PECOTA! YOU AREN'T WELCOME HERE! GET THE HELL OFF MY PROPERTY

PECOTA: YOUNG SOUTHPAW, LISTEN TO WHAT HAS BEEN SPOKEN!!!

¡YAH!

fLORIdA: Anyway. Listen to me, Willis! That's your name, right? Willis?

MeTrain: yeeh

fLORIdA: Willis, I'm going to be firing your manager soon. He took a miserably low payroll and used it to somehow put together a contender.

fLORIdA: But then he politely asked me not to be an obnoxious dickhole during a game once. I don't want that sort of atmosphere associated with our club.

MeTrain: quit paradin ya stupid shit, what ya charadin, a bowl a kix

fLORIdA: I don't give a fuck what you think. I'm going to move this team to goddamn Davenport, Iowa if I want to.

fLORIdA: I've decided to fire everyone else on the team. You're lucky I'm afraid of heights, otherwise I'd be standing on that mound instead of you. I'm going to be your catcher from now on, since I'm clearly a goddamn baseball expert.

fLORIdA: Come on! Throw one right at me, Willis! Right in the mitt!

MeTrain: aight fine

/rears back

fLORIdA: /ugggghhhhhhhhhhhh

MeTrain: looks like ya lost another loan ta ditech ya lil fatcake