The Dugout
By B - 9-6-07
Click pictures for player info.


Kyle stared into his brother's eyes.

Or whoever he was, today.

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: so it begins

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: is it "trouble" or "double trouble," I can't remember

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: the prodgical son, the good samaritan, the rib of my flesh has returnt... and as fortolt on the insides of the bible kane shall rise up to smote the cowartly abel with the tombed-stone an covet his figs, or whateve-

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: what're you talking about, I show up regularly to see how you're doing and try to get you to come over to my team and play with me

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: come again shortcake

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: What about back when you were playing for the Cubs?

j3FF_F4rnsw0rth: hey kyle farnsworth this is jeff farnsworth our names are both farnsworth we should pitch for the same team

kyl3_F4rnsw0rth: fuckk offffff

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: maybe you were tolt to fuck it off because you had a toothpaste logo on yer hat

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: we were the mouse that never roared

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: suck a youppi's dick

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: hey buddy guess what, i got a gig pitching in the minors for the chicago white sox!!!! no more pitching to the backstop in olympic stadium

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: olympic stadium

is that where they playt the olympics

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: i think they did the opening and closing ceremonies there

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: oly shit that is patheticccc

news flash tom tucker i play for the detroit tigers an when people say who is your tiger they are talken about mwah

we are worlt series bounded this year an are destinied to be champions

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: well the white sox won it all last year

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: patheticccc stop liven in the past what are you the younger doc brown

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: fallen off the commode, tryen to find the secrets of the universe

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: even in the National League I followed you, trying to get your attention

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: Kyle, I'm back in the bigs. I'm pitching with the Phillies. If you want, we could...

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: hahah somebody pisst all over yer cap

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: way to wear a hat piss-pot-pete, try playen for a team that doesnt have 100,000,000 losses

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: an now you play for the bostong red sox, gg jiff

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: And that's what brings me here today. Kyle, you and I are a living, breathing SYMBOL of Baseball's Biggest Rivalry.

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: A Yankee. A Red Sock. Brothers?

DoctorProctor: In Christ's eyes we're ALL brothers!

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: shut up, scott

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: It doesn't matter. Because right now, on the Yankees, you mean nothing.

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: boy i swurr

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: Face it. You used to be a hotshot with a fiery temper, and now you're a faceless cog in the Evil machine. People can't tell you apart from Sean Henn. The only difference is that you shaved your head for fraternity and nobody followed suit.

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: If you leave the Yankees and come pitch for the Sawks, you will be tipping the scales of baseball's biggest rivalry and striking a blow straight into the heart of the beast.

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: and it'll be the first strike you've thrown in months.

Cat Osterman Gato: Ouch.
Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: shut up

i throw a lot of strikes

they just dont always get all the way to the catcher

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: No team wants to keep you. Your best friends leave you. Soon, this will all be at an end.

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: Join me, and we can rule the AL East together!

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: /removes hip eyeglasses
/rubs forehead

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: pitchen with my bro

with not my bro

pitchen with not my bro

...

i have always wisht to pitch with not my bro...

Cat Osterman Gato: What're you going to do, Kyle?

DoctorProctor: eep! What a story of intrigue!

Farnsworth

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: nobody gives a rip what you think scott, not even a rip

i...

i...

F4rnsw0rth_b3ntl3y: /smiles slyly