Gato: I saw you pitch for the first time, last night! Which is weird, because I've known you for like a year. You were so good!

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: they tolt me not to drive my fort explorer onto the field but i did it anywayz, cause thats how i'm rollt

Gato: yeah, I wanted to ask you about that. You just kept throwing your hands up and dancing around the car, even when you gave up six walks and four doubles. What were you doing?

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: ghost riden the WHIP

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: you should see my brother jeff pitch, he flails around an wiggles his fingers and feet an shit

that bap looks like bill cosby off of the cosbied show themed-song

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: he ghost dads the WHIP

Gato: y'know, now that you bring it up, I wanted to ask you about that, too.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: about what, ghost dad

it is a haunting parable about how bill cosby can never die

Gato: No, about Jeff. Hopefully you don't mind me asking this, because it's kind of heavy.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: it aint heavy hes my brother

Gato: Well, okay, I know you're both named "Farnsworth" and you both grew up in Wichita, Kansas. Jeff was born in 75, you were born in 76. Right?

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: right but on a sliden scale hes still the little brother

j3FF_F4rnsw0rth: okey dokey okefenokee /slides down sliding board

WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! nyah hee hee nyah hee hee

j3FF_F4rnsw0rth: okay little brudder now you try

little brudder /turns around

kyl3_F4rnsw0rth: /speeds down sliding board
/double boots Jeff in the back

j3FF_F4rnsw0rth: AAAAAAOWWW /flies off sliding board

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: the next time he callt me little brother i broke his power wheels over my knee like bo jackston

Gato: But it says on Baseball Reference that Jeff was born in October of 75. Weren't you born in April of 76?

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: yup, doctor dunkenstein kyle farnsworth was br0n under the sign of ares god of war

jeff was born a libra which is spanish for 'girl book'

Gato: That only puts six months between your birthdays. So, like... your Mom would've had to recover from childbirth, get pregnant again, carry you to term, and then have you in six months.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: an yer mom wrote 'xavier roberts' in cursive on your lanky doot shoot, whats yer point

Gato: Were you like a super-preemie or something?

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: what the fuck is a preemie

Gato: A premature birth. The birth of a baby before the standard period of pregnancy is completed.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: what the fuck are birth, babies, and pregnancies

wait did you just call me premature

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: nothen i do is premature i can face up to an includen three batsmen in a night

you above all peoples should know i aint premature im into crazy shit like soft musics an doen it in the inside of a car

Gato: But what about that time I brought out the whipped cream? You just got out of bed and started dancing around.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: i was ghost riden it

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: but he

Gato: It just doesn't add up. The math isn't right. Your Mom couldn't have done that biologically.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: but if i dident boot jeff off the slide for callen me brother, who did i boot

kyl3_F4rnsw0rth: /speeds down sliding board
/double boots random kid in the back