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CalJr2131: Mr. Angelos, can I have a moment of your time? I wanted to talk to you about something personal, but it's also about business. |
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PeterAngel: /pauses in the middle of writing out 200 million dollar check to Roger Cedeno
I can literally spare one moment, what's on your mind? |
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CalJr2131: I wanted to let you know that I would be interested in buying the Orioles, should they ever come up for sale. |
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PeterAngel: Is that so? |
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CalJr2131: Yes, sir. Right now I'm very content in learning the business in the minor leagues and also developing kids' complexes and really growing the game of baseball at the grass-roots level. But certainly if that ever became an opportunity, I certainly would look to be a part of that. |
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PeterAngel: Why, I never knew you thought that way! |
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CalJr2131: Yes, sir, and I would come in to work like, 4,000 days in a row. |
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PeterAngel: You know, some days I grow tired of the fans and media picking apart everything I do. IN FACT, I'm tempted to literally move my pen toward a different piece of paper on this desk and literally sign over the team to you. |
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PeterAngel: Everyone seems to like you, even those who discredit you. Hell, your love of baseball and accomplishments helped rekindle the nation's love of baseball after the strike. |
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PeterAngel: You're a former rookie of the year, two time MVP, a 19-time All-Star and a 2-time All-Star Game MVP, so you know the game as well as anyone. |
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PeterAngel: Your 21 seasons as the stalwart leader of the Orioles is a testament to your love of the game, the city, and the fans. And now you're a Hall of Famer! |
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CalJr2131: Thank you, sir. |
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PeterAngel: Yes, I am going to literally make you the new owner of the Baltimore Orioles and usher in a new Golden Era for Charm City baseball.
However, before I go through with this, I must get approval from one man. |
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CalJr2131: *gasp* You don't mean? |
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PeterAngel: Yes. I need the approval of one DAILY SOUTHTOWN COLUMNIST PAUL LADEWSKI. |
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**Online Host**
Paul Ladewski has stepped out of a nearby mirror.
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LADEWSKI: who dares summon paul ladewski |
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PeterAngel: Paul, I'm considering signing over the Orioles to Cal Ripken, Jr. |
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LADEWSKI: Looks like I'm about to turn Cal Ripken, Jr., and Baltimore fans into a bunch of crabapples, huh! Offended? good, stay tuned |
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LADEWSKI: I'm not going to say that Cal Ripken, Jr., doesn't deserve to own the Orioles, but am I the only one here who doesn't get all the "hooplah" about the so-called "Iron Man?" |
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LADEWSKI: Honus Wagner never got a chance to own the Orioles. Neither did Roberto Clemente. What makes Ripken so special? I am judging all people against each other at all times. |
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LADEWSKI: I mean, who is to say that Ripken never did steroids? I of course am not going to take a bold stance and say this, but rather use it as a vague, overly broad reason to make myself the focus of your question. |
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LADEWSKI: As Paul Ladewski, sportswriter, I am counted on to be the moral compass for humanity and mystical protectorate of baseball's innocence, and as such I must stand firm and only provide a blank response to your question. |
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LADEWSKI: Because someone somewhere did steroids and I am sure of it. So here goes: |
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LADEWSKI:
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PeterAngel: Holy shit, this guy is too hot for the Internet! Fuck, I'm burning! |
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LADEWSKI: Whenever a wrong needs righted, I will be there to write about it condescendingly.
I love sports. It's so bad.
/jogs out of room making motorcycle noises |
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CalJr2131: what is going on |
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PeterAngel: /yankes papers away
Sorry, Billy, six more years of winter! Hahaha! |
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**Online Host**
Meanwhile, in the Mansion of Heaven Chatroom...
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LidleHands: Christ, what's wrong with the people down there? |
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Marilyn_Munson: haha I told you |
