The Dugout
By B - 1-6-06
Click pictures for player info.

**Online Host**
Welcome to the Mobile Regional Airport Chatroom!

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: /parks Plymouth Barracuda* sideways in middle of the street

 

*dodge stratus

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: /totally pimp-struts into airport

Lady Cop

LadyCop: Excuse me, sir, you can't park there. You're going to have to move your car.

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: /lowers sunglasses to tip of nose
/looks
/pushes sunglasses back up

/totally continues the pimp-strut

Lady Cop

LadyCop: SIR

SIR

You're going to have to move your car, sir, I'm serious. Your car is illegally parked.

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: /does double-take incredulously
/smiles

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: Excuse ME... /flicks cop's badge

...MISS... don't you know who I am? Of course you know who I am. Don't you know who I am?

Lady Cop

LadyCop: you are wearing a full baseball uniform so I'm going to guess "baseball player."

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: She doesn't understand. She doesn't understand! /pulls airport patron aside

Can you believe these people? She doesn't understand!

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: Look lady, I'm Jake Peavy of a little baseball club you might've heard of... the San Diego Padres. I snack on danger and dine on death. I had a 4.09 ERA last year. I can buy and sell your entire family!

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: I didn't get to be a San Diego Padre by parking my car correctly or obeying commonly known traffic laws.

Do you know how I GOT to be a San Diego Padre... /flicks cop's badge

...MISS?

Lady Cop

LadyCop: you played baseball

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: Ha. Ha! "Played baseball." Greg Legg "played baseball."

/gets right up in lady cop's grill

I was BORN a San Diego Padre.

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: Write me up a ticket and I'll pay for it. /throws wad of thousand-dollar bills on the ground

/pops collar of fur coat

**Online Host**
EVPeavyJapanevy is now smarming the hell of a lady cop.
Lady Cop

LadyCop: ok then how does jail sound

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: oh come onnnn

Lady Cop

LadyCop: nope, jail

Jake Peavy

EVPeavyJapanevy: aw come onnnnnnnnnnnnnnn