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**Online Host**
Welcome to the Mobile Regional Airport Chatroom! |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: /parks Plymouth Barracuda* sideways in middle of the street
*dodge stratus |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: /totally pimp-struts into airport |
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LadyCop: Excuse me, sir, you can't park there. You're going to have to move your car. |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: /lowers sunglasses to tip of nose
/looks
/pushes sunglasses back up
/totally continues the pimp-strut |
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LadyCop: SIR
SIR
You're going to have to move your car, sir, I'm serious. Your car is illegally parked. |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: /does double-take incredulously
/smiles |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: Excuse ME... /flicks cop's badge
...MISS... don't you know who I am? Of course you know who I am. Don't you know who I am? |
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LadyCop: you are wearing a full baseball uniform so I'm going to guess "baseball player." |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: She doesn't understand. She doesn't understand! /pulls airport patron aside
Can you believe these people? She doesn't understand! |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: Look lady, I'm Jake Peavy of a little baseball club you might've heard of... the San Diego Padres. I snack on danger and dine on death. I had a 4.09 ERA last year. I can buy and sell your entire family! |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: I didn't get to be a San Diego Padre by parking my car correctly or obeying commonly known traffic laws.
Do you know how I GOT to be a San Diego Padre... /flicks cop's badge
...MISS? |
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LadyCop: you played baseball |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: Ha. Ha! "Played baseball." Greg Legg "played baseball."
/gets right up in lady cop's grill
I was BORN a San Diego Padre. |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: Write me up a ticket and I'll pay for it. /throws wad of thousand-dollar bills on the ground
/pops collar of fur coat |
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**Online Host**
EVPeavyJapanevy is now smarming the hell of a lady cop.
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LadyCop: ok then how does jail sound |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: oh come onnnn |
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LadyCop: nope, jail |
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EVPeavyJapanevy: aw come onnnnnnnnnnnnnnn |