Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

Go for it, everybody!  What do you find interesting about yourself?  What things have you done that you think are funny or cool?  What possessions do you own?  What are you top 10 favorite ______ ? 

This is a great way to prove to myself how little you people care about anything anyone else has to say.  Since this isn't your post, you're not bothering to read it, are you?  Good. 

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 11241

Great idea for a post! 

I can do a handstand and even take a few steps on my hands!

I have three cats and five fish!  I don't have any kids, but I sure would like some!  Where are you, Mr. Right?

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

Hopelessly trapped in your orbit, you giant fleshy astral presence, you. 

oh, I forgot!  I also have a whole shelf of these cute little Precious Moments dolls.  They're so cute!!!!

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

Whoa.  You really can't hear me, can you?

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 8745

MY TOP 5 FIVE FAVORITE MOVIES

1. BACKDRAFT
2. TREMORS 2 AFTERSHOCK
3. THE "ARE YALL READY FOR THIS" SONG
4. HARRY AND THE HENDERSONS
5. THE EWOK ADVENTURE
6. DANTE'S PEAK
7. VOLCANO
8. DAYLIGHT
9. FIRESTORM
10. BROKEN ARROW
11. EMILY'S REASONS WHY NOT

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 15674

I had this weird dream where I was a giraffe in a circus.  They would feed me peanuts and stuff.  What do you think that means, everybody?  Was I a giraffe because I'm tall in real life?

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

This is amazing.  I can speak with immunity from how others may react!  It's not like that's ever stopped me from being a dick before.  And...it's not like I couldn't just close my browser and do this in Notepad.  But still.  Extraordinary.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 11241

When I was 8 I went to school with Bob Saget's son.  We were on a first-name basis for a while.  I even slept over at their house and he asked me if I wanted some cereal the next morning.  I wonder how ol' Bob's doing these days.  We really need to catch up on each other's lives!

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 15674

A lot of people tell me I look like Commander Riker from Star Trek: The Next Generation.  I mean, I don't see it, but what do you guys think?  I also get told I look like kind of a white Denzel Washington, by the way.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

Ugh.  How inane can you people get?  Do you honestly believe anyone else gives half a fuck?  Do you?

I just set my playlist to random, and the first track was a song by The Beatles, and the next was "My Father's Eyes" by Amy Grant, and another was a Counting Crows song!  Ha!  My musical tastes are all over the place.  I'm so nutty!  It might just be my music background.  My grandfather used to play the trumpet.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 11241

The other day I decided to make some guacamole, and you know what?  It was really good!

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

Okay.  Suddenly this isn't so fun anymore.  Stop it!  All of you!

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 15674

If I had to pick a favorite number, it'd probably be 19.  I really don't know why.

In my living room I have: a TV I've owned since 2002, a couch I got in 1996, a coffee table I got in...I want to say...1998?  Yeah, because that's the year I moved across town.  I bought this rug last year after I decided the room looked a little empty.  I think I'll probably do something with the walls next.  Get a few nice pictures of the Medeival times that I saw from Target, maybe.  Oh!  And I got that lamp in June of 1992, I think it was.  Geez, has it really been that long?

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

SHUT UP

ALL OF YOU SHUT UP

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 11241

Today I was like, "Do I want to wear my new black T-shirt, or that old shirt I got at that Rembrandts concert I went to?  Because my new one's really...well...new, but my Rembrandts shirt is one of those sentimental old favorites!  I decided to wear the black one.  I want to say I had Cheerios for breakfast this morning, but you know...it might have been Mueslix.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

NO MORE OF THIS

I think if I were any member of Home Improvement I would probably be Jill.  She's so sassy and smart and always knows how to keep her Timmy in line!  I would say Heidi is probably a close second.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

sigh...

I broke a bone one time.  I was in third grade.  I fell off a swing and broke my arm.  Other than that, though, everyone always said I was pretty tough.

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 9415

That was actually...kind of satisfying.  Maybe it's not so bad, then.  Maybe these sorts of threads just serve as pseudo-public brag sessions.  Maybe it doesn't ultimately matter that nobody else cares, because I care, and that's what's important.

Wait a second, that's absolutely disgusting.  What the fuck is wrong with me?

you are what is known as a human person

it is an unfortunate affliction

i attempt to emulate the puppy dog and antelope more and more each passing day 

Registered: January 15, 2026
Posts: 11241

My favorite anatomical systems include the central nervous system, the pulmonary system, and the respiratory system!  If I had to pick just one it would be so hard to choose because they're all so great!!!