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Cartoon
Smurfs

Animal
Smurf

Outfit: white footie pajama pants / white hat / flower

Tagline: Substituting the word "smurf" for random verbs or nouns in a sentence. Example:

“We are the middle children of history, raised by television to believe that someday we’ll be millionaires and movie stars and rock stars, but we won’t. And we’re just learning this fact,” Tyler said. “So don’t smurf with us.”

Plot summary: The Smurfs are a sentient society of little blue asexual creatures three-apples high who live, have occupations, and try to avoid being stepped on/thrown into a large pot. Yes, you standup comedian, Smurfs are asexual. A baby Smurf is delivered to Smurf Village by a stork every blue moon. No, Smurfette did not have sex with all the other Smurfs. She was created by Gargamel as a purple Smurf with dark hair in order to lure the other Smurfs into his large pot, but her "Inner Smurf" came shining through, she turned face, and joined Smurf society. Airline food is bad because it's cooked on an airplane, which is thousands of feet in the air where it's not ideal to have huge electrical devices and fire going all the time. And yes, your life will continue to be hard now that you've become a father. Do your goddamn research. (more)

User Comments: According to 80schildren.com:

Vanity Smurf loves to look good, and usually for Smurfette. He is there to help any fellow smurf when needed, but he always makes sure to look his best while doing it.

I assume that Smurf culture differs from human culture, so I won't condescend on his natural observations on beauty, but I will commend him for walking around the forest in the dirt wearing bright white pants without ever getting them dirty.

Also:

He always has a flower on his hat because it makes him feel good and adds to his natural charm.

Sadly America turned on him when Latoya London was voted off despite Vanity's ass performance the previous week.

Oh please, like Smurf Village doesn't have at least five other loud, obnoxious black singers.

User Rating: 9.6/10 (213135813813843513813810 Hawaiian votes)