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Cartoon
Jana of the Jungle
The Godzilla Power Hour
Godzilla Super 90

Animal
Grows stronger on the Veldt








Outfit: bondage collar / strapless red dress / smarmy chinchilla

Tagline: "You:  Jane.  Me:   uh, well, Jane."

Plot summary: Jana of the Jungle (clearly explained, so you don't get her confused with Jana of the Desert or Jana of the Temperate Midwestern States) was abandoned in the rain forests of South America when her father crashed his boat, "The African Queen," under mysterious circumstances.   Jana was raised by the locals and became the defender of the Amazon alongside her friends Ben (a wildlife biologist), Montaro (an ancient Indian warrior), and Ghost (dead pottery-enthusiast Patrick Swayze).  The search for her father, who was evidently Humphrey Bogart, was the focus of every show that didn't involve Jana stumbling onto the ancient civilization of whatever. 

"Jana of the Jungle" had lost civilizations of everything.  Incas, Mayans, oversized Amazon women, beast men, you name it.  I was convinced for the longest time that wherever you went in South America you would find an ancient civilization.  Like, you could run down a street in Brazil, turn a corner, and find fucking Hammurabi squatting behind some cardboard boxes in the alleyway.   But then again Hanna Barbara also taught me that I could gain momentum by levitating and running in place until the friction of my downward foot thrusts propelled me across the surface, so maybe I should've just went to school. (more)

User Comments: Jana's big attack involved taking her necklace off and throwing it at people like a boomerang, which would either work as a blunt object or a knife depending on I'm guessing finger placement.  Her white jaguar, Ghost, would then retrieve the necklace in a deadly game of Jungle Fetch.  A "deadly game of Jungle Fetch" should not be confused with a "deadly game of freeze tag," which is where Dr. Dre touches you with his 44 Mag and you're frozen inside a body bag.  That game wouldn't be featured until Hanna Barbara's early 90's effort "Scooby-Doo, Where Tha Fuck You At?"

Jana's necklace relegated the effectiveness of Wonder Woman's bracelets and Captain America's shield to the lower-head/upper-collarbone region of the body.  You think she'd at least carry it around in her hand, so she wouldn't have to blatantly ask for people to shoot her in the neck. Maybe it wasn't a weapon as much as it was a means to keep Jana IN the jungle.  Jana fancies herself "Jana of the Local Town" so she steps out of the jungle and BOOM, her head explodes.  Maybe they just had her fixed and are trying to keep her from picking out the stitches.

Her dress makes me think she was raised by an ancient tribe of fabulous Baker Boys.

User Rating: 4.0/10 (13,881 votes)