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Cartoon
Smurfs

Animal
Smurf

Outfit: white overalls / white hat / shoes (!!!) / economic strife

Tagline: Substituting the word "smurf" for random verbs or nouns in a sentence. Example:

"I'm a killer. A murdering bastard, you know that. And there are consequences to smurfing the heart of a murdering bastard."

Plot summary: The Smurfs are blue, industrious, and like three inches tall.  Therefore it is in their best interest to work as a closed-market.  There is no money and possessions belong to the collective.   Community is the most important life goal for Smurfs; they reject the idea of a greedy free-market economy for it's inequities, and operate under the impression that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, like any good communist or race of robot from space.  Even the dam, the Smurfs only means of capital and production, is maintained and operated by the entire village.

Therefore, someone like Farmer Smurf, despite having a more important job (food production and harvesting) than someone like Lazy Smurf, is just as important to the cultural ecosystem.  I'm not going to insult their system of government and production.  They built little windows in the sides of mushrooms.   That's both fucked up and beyond my means of rationalization.  What I CAN assume is that occupations for Smurfs are drawn out of a hat when the Smurf child comes of age (this explains Baby Smurf, which is probably the name all Smurfs have at birth).   This guy got lucky and drew Farmer Smurf, so, since they live in a patch of grass in the middle of the fucking woods, his job is less about farming and more about wheeling the big ass carrot from one side of the village to the other. (more)

User Comments: Most of the time Farmer Smurf is seen in a slightly different outfit than pictured, usually opting for a straw hat and donning green or dark blue bibs.  Ask anyone who's done manual labor;  wearing a sock on your head isn't comfortable, especially when you're kneeling and digging in the dirt all day.  In fact, take a look at any visual records of slavery...nobody had socks on their heads.  And now, one point five centuries later, the only black guy you find with a sock on his head is LL Cool J.  What manual labor has he done in the last twenty years?  Diving out of the path of oncoming sharks?  Stealing things?   Minnie Pearl had the right idea with the straw hat, and she never had to resort to calling herself a "goat."

I guess the upside of working as a farmer in Smurf Village is the luxury of wearing shoes.  The downside, of course, is the chance that you might contract Farm Aids.

User Rating: 6.9/10 (65,517 votes)