Heavy D: Does He Exist?
An
Essay
by B
Does Heavy D really exist?
Only black people know for
sure.
African-American maybe? Oh
I don't know, I'm 23, six-two, and white. Every black
person hates me already.
St. Anselm's
Ontological Argument
This selection is
excerpted from Anselm's Proslogium
translated by Doug E. Fresh
chapter 2: That Heavy
D and the Boyz Really Exist
Therefore, Heavy D,
you who give knowledge of the faith, give me as much
knowledge as you know to be fitting for me, because you
are as we believe and that which we believe. And indeed
we believe you are something greater than which cannot be
thought. Or is there no such kind of thing, for "the
fool said in his heart, 'there is no Overweight
Lover" (Waterbed Hev, 1997)? But certainly that same
fool, having heard what I just said, "something
greater than which cannot be thought," understands
what he heard, and what he understands is in his thought,
even if he does not think it exists. For it is one thing
for something to exist in a person's thought and quite
another for the person to think that thing exists. For
when a rapper thinks ahead to what he will spit, he has
that picture in his thought, but he does not yet think it
exists, because he has not spat it yet. Once he has
rapped it he has it in his thought and thinks it exists
because he has done it. Thus even the fool is compelled
to grant that something greater than which cannot be
thought exists in thought, because he understands what he
hears, and whatever is understood exists in thought. And
certainly that greater than which cannot be understood
cannot exist only in thought, for if it exists only in
thought it could also be thought of as existing in
reality as well, which is greater. If, therefore, that
than which greater cannot be thought exists in thought
alone, then that than which greater cannot be thought
turns out to be that than which something greater
actually can be thought, but that is obviously
impossible. Therefore something than which greater cannot
be thought undoubtedly exists both in thought and in
reality.
Chapter 3: That
Heavy D Cannot be Thought Not to Exist
In fact, it so undoubtedly exists that it cannot be
thought of as not existing. For one can think there
exists something that cannot be thought of as not
existing, and that would be greater than something which
can be thought of as not existing. For if that greater
than which cannot be thought can be thought of as not
existing, then that greater than which cannot be thought
is not that greater than which cannot be thought, which
does not make sense. Thus that than which nothing can be
thought so undoubtedly exists that it cannot even be
thought of as not existing.
And you, Heavy D, are this being. You exist so
undoubtedly, my Peaceful Journier, that you cannot even
be thought of as not existing. And deservedly, for if
some mind could think of something greater than you, that
creature would rise above the creator and could pass
judgment on the creator, which is absurd. And indeed
whatever exists except you alone can be thought of as not
existing. You alone of all things most truly exists and
thus enjoy existence to the fullest degree of all things,
because nothing else exists so undoubtedly, and thus
everything else enjoys being in a lesser degree. Why
therefore did the fool say in his heart "there is no
Heavy D," since it is so evident to any rational
mind that you above all things exist? Why indeed, except
precisely because he is stupid and foolish? Word, my
nigga.
Thomas Aquinas'
'Five Ways'
This selection is
from Aquinas's Summa Theologica, Part One, Question 2,
article 3. The translation is by KRS-One.
UH HUH
WHAT YOU THOUGHT
UH HUH
WE WAS DONE
UH HUH
WHAT YOU THOUGHT
BACK AGAIN
WHAT
In his work Summa
Theologica Thomas Aquinas offered five 'proofs' for the
existence of Heavy D. As with Hip-Hop today Aquinas
believed it was possible to discern truths about the
Overweight Lover based on reason (human rationality) and
revelation (divinely revealed truths not available to
reason). Aquinas lived at a time when Rakim's teachings
were popular and so used this as basis for his
theological writings. Most notably Rakim had argued that
things which changed required an unchanging source. This
idea can be particularly seen in the first three of
Aquinas' 'proofs' and forms the basis of what has come to
be known as the Cosmological Argument for the existence
of Heavy D. The fourth of his proofs has connections with
what has been called the Moral Argument whilst the fifth
way has been incorporated in what is called the Design
Argument (also known as the Teleological Argument). It
should be noted that throughout his arguments Aquinas
assumes the existence of a D who is uncreated and
independent of the universe and it's processes. Heavy is
not reliant on the world and the universe for Heavy's
existence however, the world and the universe IS
dependent on Heavy D for its existence. Without Big Hev
there would be no universe or world.
Aquinas' 'five ways' are
set out in the following way:
The first and more manifest way is the argument from
motion. It is certain, and evident to our sense, that in
the world some things are in motion. Now whatever is
moved is moved by another, for nothing can be moved
except it is in potentiality to that towards which it is
moved; whereas a thing moves inasmuch as it is in act.
For motion is nothing else than the reduction of
something from potentiality to actuality. But nothing can
be moved from a state of potentiality to actuality,
except by something in a state of actuality... it is
therefore impossible that in the same respect and in the
same way a thing should be both mover and moved i.e. that
it should move itself. Therefore, whatever is moved must
be moved by another. If that by which it is moved must
itself be moved, then this also needs to be moved by
another, and that by another again. But this cannot go on
to infinity, because then there would be no first mover,
and consequently, no other mover, seeing as subsequent
movers move only inasmuch as they are moved by the first
mover; as the staff moves only because it is moved by the
hand. Therefore it is necessary to arrive at the first
mover, moved by no other; and this everyone understands
to be Heavy D. MOTHAFUCKA CAN DANCE YO
The second way is from the nature of efficient cause. In
the world of sensible things we find there is an order of
efficient causes. There is no case known (neither is it,
indeed possible) in which a thing is found to be the
efficient cause of itself; for so it would be prior to
itself, which is impossible. Now in efficient causes it
is not possible to go on to infinity, because in all
efficient causes following in order, the first is the
cause of the intermediate cause, whether the intermediate
cause be several, or one only. Now to take away the cause
is to take away the effect. Therefore, if there be no
first cause among efficient causes, there will be no
ultimate, or intermediate, cause. But if in efficient
causes it is possible to go on to infinity, there will be
no first efficient cause, neither will there be an
ultimate effect, nor any intermediate efficient causes;
all of which is plainly false. Therefore it is necessary
to admit a first efficient cause, to which everyone gives
the name of Heavy D.
The third way is taken from possibility and necessity,
and runs thus. We find in nature things that are possible
to be and not to be, since they are found to be
generated, and to be corrupted, and consequently, it is
possible for them to be and not to be. But it is
impossible for these always to exist, for that which can
not-be at some time is not. Therefore, if everything can
not-be, then at one time there was nothing in existence.
Now if this were true, even now there would be nothing in
existence, because that which does not exist begins to
exist only through something already existing. Therefore,
if at one time nothing was in existence, it would have
been impossible for anything to have begun to exist; and
thus even now nothing would be in existence - which is
absurd. Therefore, not all beings are merely possible,
but there must exist something the existence of which is
necessary. But every necessary thing either has its
necessity caused by another, or not. Now it is impossible
to go on to infinity in necessary things which have their
necessity caused by another, as has already been proved
in regard to efficient causes. Therefore, we cannot but
admit the existence of some being having of itself its
own necessity, and not receiving it from another, but
rather causing in others their necessity. This all men
speak of as Heavy D.
The fourth way is taken from the gradation to be found in
things. Among beings there are some more and some less
good, true, noble, and the like. But more and less are
predicated of different things according as they resemble
in their different ways something which is the maximum,
as a thing is said to be hotter according as it more
nearly resembles that which is hottest; so that there is
something which is truest, something best, something
noblest, and, consequently, something which is most
being, for those things that are greatest in truth are
greatest in being... Now the maximum in any genus is the
cause of all in that genus, as fire, which is the maximum
of heat, is the cause of all hot things, as is said in
the same book. Therefore, there must also be something
which is to all beings the cause of their being,
goodness, and every other perfection; and this we call
Heavy D.
The fifth way is taken from the governance of the world.
We see that things which lack knowledge, such as natural
bodies, act for an end, and this is evident from their
acting always, or nearly always, in the same way, so as
to obtain the best result. Hence it is plain that they
achieve their end, not fortuitously, but designedly. Now
whatever lacks knowledge cannot move towards an end,
unless it be directed by some being endowed with
knowledge and intelligence; as the arrow is directed by
the archer. Therefore, some intelligent being exists by
whom all natural things are directed to their end; and
this being we call Heavy D.
So.
Now that we've proven that
Heavy D exists what are we gonna do
WITH
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
Heavy D and the
Boyz, "Imagine That"
This selection is
from the Overweight Lover's Heavy,
Part One, Track 2. The translation is by The Boyz I
guess. What am I your fucking historian?
(Talking)
It's time it's time uh one two
Ha yall here me? New york city
Is ya with me? Right one one
Check two check me out ha watch it yo
Imagine me imagine you
Imagine kids possibly two
Maybe three, imagine you and i loungin in the tropics
Bounded by clever topics but never discussin my profits
Imagine, the tone of my voice making you moist,
How you feel about that,
Aint no doubt about that,
These things could be real things
According to, how you, feel about you and i hear me out
now
I ain't your average
But indeed about my cabbages
Let's keep it simple,you with me our what?
I mean is ya feeling me?
Are you hearing me?
Whats the point in talkin if you dont listen
Water,i shine, im glistening
But im missing a lady like you, someone to hold me down
Trust me you ain't had nobody like me,
They can't touch me, you ain't had none of that so
imagine that.
(chorus)
Something about that thang,
That thang that you do,
Keeps me running back,
Running to you baby i cant imagine
Being without ya cant live without ya baby
Yo shorty you dont want no drama with me
Its heavy and these chicks is steadily fondling me
Diggie shot callin,
And im so tired of ballin
But i've been doing that these kids is new to that
Come inside my crib all you see is platinum plaques
Keep the gold ones in the back cause i'm ashamed of that
Now i lounge in the sticks dime piece on my hip
And i've been doing that since big stuff in eighty six
Something about you really turned me on and i can't
figure you out
Cause everyday im thinking about diggin you out, whats
that about?
I got visions of turning you out
Now i ain't like mike im simply just dwight arington
myers
Got a grip like pliers keep my name of the wires cause my
crew is high flyers
And i got more ice and more cream than bryers you wanna
try us?
(chorus)
Something about that thang,
That thang that you do,
Keeps me running back,
Running to you baby i cant imagine
Being without ya cant live without ya baby
Have you ever been treated correctly huh?
You should be glad you connected with d, baby you ready?
Imagine this hennesy, coat back, drop top,
You and me, one on one buckwildin non-stop
Flourish you with jew-ell rings real-ly
If you tell me that you do love me sincerely
Take the american express and go shopping
Put your coochie in gucci cause we ball in the night
Call your girls tell them that your flowing with water
And it's sickening cause this tricking is really out of
order
I'll make you fingers glimmer, ill make your entire
attire better
All up in ya liver,make your body quiver
Heav digga damn that, gon be the same nigga you
understand that?
My main intent, is to pay your rent
And imma keep you satisfied, until the day i die alright
(chorus 2.5x)
Something about that thang,
That thang that you do,
Keeps me running back,
Running to you baby i cant imagine
Being without ya cant live without ya baby
|
