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**Online
Host** You have entered the Minnesota Twins Ballpark Negotiation
chatroom. |
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perils_of_pawlenty:
As Governor, I understand the role that a sports team plays in a
state's vibrance and economic well-being. That's why I'm
committed to doing what it takes to keeping the Twins in Minnesota. |
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perils_of_pawlenty:
However, the Metrodome is a fine place to play ball, and a great place
for families to enjoy themselves.
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Coach_ProtectTheEmployee: I'm sorry, but I have to disagree.
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Tori_Misspelling: Dude. We share our
field with a pro football team and
a college football team. And our outfield wall is made out of
garbage bags. Fuck you.
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perils_of_pawlenty:
I acknowledge these concerns, and would like to work with you on a
resolution. I have had blueprints drawn up for a new
ballpark right here in Minneapolis/St.Paul! |
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Coach_ProtectTheEmployee: Wow, I'm impressed! Any details? |
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perils_of_pawlenty:
Why, yes. It's important that this stadium accommodate
Minnesota for years to come. We have designed it to seat 800,000
people. The field will be five square kilometers and will
perfectly suit some sort of sport that involves 910 players on each
side and may or may not exist in the future. This sport will
likely involve jet packs and a ball that can morph into a suitcase and
gatling gun. |
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perils_of_pawlenty:
In keeping with the spirit of today's Metrodome, the scoreboard will be
held up by giant toilet paper rolls, and the turf will be made of
Scotch-Brite scouring pads. |
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perils_of_pawlenty:
In addition, on Saturday games you will share shallow center field with
Garrison Keiller and his Prairie Home Companion radio show. |
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Tori_Misspelling: what
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perils_of_pawlenty:
Yeah, it'll be great! Hey, I'll bring him in here! You'll
see! |
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Tori_Misspelling: This is bullshit.
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**OnlineHost**
death_row_security
has entered the chatroom. |
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death_row_security: I'd like to tell all of you a
little story that happened the other day in Lake Wobegon.
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death_row_security: blah blah blah blah blah i
knew a slow kid named danny blah blah blah blah blah didn't know he was
mentally ill blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah ran into him
on the bus stop one day said "danny how are you" |
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Tori_Misspelling: hmmmmm
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death_row_security: blah blah blah blah blah blah
guy noir, private eye! blah blah blah blah blah computers???? who
has time?!!?!?!!?? |
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Tori_Misspelling: heh
heeheehee
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death_row_security: blah blah blah blah blah
wardrobe malfunction? ohhhhh dear... |
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Tori_Misspelling: -pfffft-
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Coach_ProtectTheEmployee: Ohhhhhhkay. |
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Coach_ProtectTheEmployee: You're now officially
whiter than me. That's not allowed. |