**OnlineHost** You have entered the St. Louis Cardinals Spring Training chatroom.

broken_ankiel: I've been hitting well so far this spring, but our #5 starter is Vince Coleman. My team needs me to pitch like I once did.

Pujol_Junkie: here jus throw e'pitch you'll be fine

broken_ankiel:All right. Here we go.

/throws from mound

**OnlineHost** The ball has knocked the DirecTV satellite out of orbit.

CarpenterCharisma: ahhh god think of a joke think of a joke think of a joke

Pujol_Junkie: now people will not be able to watch e'baseball

CarpenterCharisma: /rimshot

Pujol_Junkie: don't try so hard, jus throw e'ball over e'plate

broken_ankiel:All right, sounds good.

/deep breath

/throws ball 20 mph over plate

Pujol_Junkie: /swings

**OnlineHost** The ball has knocked the Baseball Network satellite back into orbit.

Pujol_Junkie: son of e'bitch

broken_ankiel:See! I can't do this! I suck! I'm worthless!

Pujol_Junkie: stop throwing e'fuss

broken_ankiel:I wasn't! That was my fastball!

Pujol_Junkie: what

oh lol

CarpenterCharisma: I can't believe you knocked the Baseball Network satellite back into place. You know what this means, right? Soon we're going to be interrupted at inopportune times on a regular basis.

CarpenterCharisma: Quick. Let's tell the funniest joke ever told. You start.

Pujol_Junkie: so a guy walks into e'bar

**OnlineHost** We interrupt this program for an important update from the Baseball Network!

hannah_storm:

**OnlineHost** We now return you to your game, already in progress.

Pujol_Junkie: /twirls six-shooter

look i'm e'wyatt earp

**OnlineHost** We interrupt this program for an important update from the Baseball Network!

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

**OnlineHost** We now return you to your game, already in progress.

mcgee_and_me: /stares at javelin in chest

i think m'hart's all bustit up

**OnlineHost** We interrupt this program for an important update from the Baseball Network!

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

**OnlineHost** We now return you to your game, already in progress.

pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth: /pratfalls into garbage can filled with tampons

well you know what i

**OnlineHost** We interrupt this program for an important update from the Baseball Network!

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

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hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

**OnlineHost** We now return you to your game, already in progress.

charlie_hustle: /spills grape juice on checkerboard

**OnlineHost** We interrupt this program for an important update from the Baseball Network!

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

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hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

hannah_storm:

**OnlineHost** We now return you to your game, already in progress.

WordUpThome: THE AR

WordUpThome: ARISTOCRATS