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**Online Host**
HurdleWax has entered the chatroom, brandishing a handgun.
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HurdleWax: WHERE IS HE /cocks gun
WHERE IS JAVY LOPEZ! |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: Calm down Coach! Calm down! |
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HurdleWax: NO! HE WON'T STOP ASKING ME IF HE CAN PLAY EVERY DAY AND I'VE HAD ENOUGH
AFTER GAMES HE COMPLAINS TO ME THAT WE DON'T LET HIM STAND AT HOME PLATE WHEN THE FIELD CLOSES |
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HurdleWax: I LET HIM BE ON THE TEAM AND HE REPAYS ME WITH SCORN
NOW I'M GOING TO SHOOT HIM IN HIS MOUTH |
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rigo_suave: Give me the gun! I know him. I pitched to him in Baltimore. I know how he moves! |
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HurdleWax: /looks down at gun
I'm not sure you'll be able to shoot him, if I give you the gun. |
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rigo_suave: I'm loyal to the Rockies! I won't let my friendships get in the way! |
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HurdleWax: No, I mean, you're Rodrigo Lopez. I'm not sure that if you pointed the gun at him you wouldn't shoot somebody ten feet to the left. |
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rigo_suave: i'll stand real close |
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**Online Host**
HurdleWax has handed the gun to rigo_suave. |
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HurdleWax: You'd better finish this, Rodrigo. We have to win games, and we don't have the money to raise Coors Field another 5,000 feet. |
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HurdleWax: Future GenRations depend on you. |
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**Online Host**
davy_lopez has entered the chatroom.
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davy_lopez: hey everybody i was checking the starting lineup for this exhibition game against the 4H club and i noticed i was playing bench, i was wondering if i could instead play OH SHIT WHAT'RE YOU DOING WITH THAT GUN |
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rigo_suave: /gun shakes
I'm ending this! We can't be a professional baseball team and have Javy Lopez on the team! |
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davy_lopez: but! but! but you're my friend! And... and you're just as awful as me! |
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rigo_suave: SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP! |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: Don't do it, bro! We don't have to do this the hard way! |
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HurdleWax: Do it! Do it now! He's too dangerous to be kept alive. Remember what you told me about your mother and the Sand People! |
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davy_lopez: WHAT THE HELL IS HE TALKING ABOUT, I'M NOT A SAND PERSON! I WAS BORN IN PUERTO RICO |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: yeah man I think that makes him a dirt person, he didn't strike down your mother! |
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rigo_suave: This isn't about strikes! It's about Rodrigo LOPEZ! |
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**Online Host**
rigo_suave has fired two shots into the darkness, killing davy_lopez. |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: no! NOOOO! |
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HurdleWax: Well done! Now we must prepare for the rise of Chris Iannetta! |
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**Online Host**
HurdleWax has left the chatroom.
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rigo_suave: All right, he fell for it! Hurry up and save him! |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: /injects Javy with various life-saving agents |
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davy_lopez: *cough cough* |
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rigo_suave: oh thank god! |
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davy_lopez: *cough* did it... did it work? |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: It did. Clint Hurdle and the Rockies think you're dead. Now you're free to leave the team without one of them killing you. |
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davy_lopez: /steely glance |
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rigo_suave: We awful Orioles have to stick together. |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: before you go, we want to thank you for everything. For the good years. For the bad. For the okay-ish. If we never see you again... thank you. In a very non-emotional, but respectful-enough way. |
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rigo_suave: We know you'll land on your knees, somewhere. And if you don't, we'll make sure that your Braves cap in the Hall of Fame's got an orange brim. |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: And you've got a good chance, because in five years the only people trying to get in are going to be you, Goose Gossage, and Jeromy Burnitz. |
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davy_lopez: Will you say goodbye to my family? |
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rigo_suave: We'll make sure they're taken care of. |
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davy_lopez: will you ask my family to let me start at catcher when i am at home |
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LaTroyAllMonsters: no |
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davy_lopez: /looks off into sunset, one last time
/puts on Aviator sunglasses
/walks away
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**Online Host**
davy_lopez has left the chatroom. |
