STRATEGY

Tired of getting your ass kicked on the server?  Want to know what makes us BITCHFUKKERS?  Well here is a quick list of DOs and DO NOTs while engaging in the art of Pac-Man.

DO NOT FUKKIN CAMP.

I see this all the time on the server.  some faggit is too lazy to chase after the ghosts, so he "pill camps" until they come close.  WELL IF YOU HOMOS CAMP AGAIN THIS IS WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU

1.

2.

For a second i thought, "wait, why is he being eaten by Pac-man and not a ghost?"  Then I remembered that whoever whines about it needs to shut their piehole because it is 1982 and this website should not even exist, so fucking live with it.

DO TALK SMACK.

This will help establish you as a hardass and someone who belongs on the BITCHFUKK server.  Here's an example of how to proceed.

pac_fan135: hi
bf_dethch0mp: BITCH
pac_fan135 has left the server

DO NOT blame it on lag.

I get real tired of this excuse.  Pac-Man is one of the simplest games of all time.  If you're lagging, then your computer is probably a pocket calculator strapped to a Lite Bright, and your Internet connection is a horseback messenger that carries pages of binary code back and forth. 

DO make clever plays on words regarding Pac-Man.

The last decade has been a difficult one, as our country has been through a military failure in Vietnam, a Presidential scandal, and an oil crisis.  Were it not for a bunch of guys who won a hockey game, we would be speaking Russian while riding our bicycles through ill-maintained city streets as giant zeppelins with sickles imprinted on them hovered menacingly above and played the theme song from Tetris over their loudspeakers. 

So what does the world need now?  Lots and lots of observations about the homoerotic connotations of the word "Pac-man." 

DO NOT wallhack.

Cheaters who use hacks that let them see through walls are ruining the game.  Shown below is the screen of someone using this cheat.

As you can see, the cheater has a huge advantage as he or she can see where everyone else is at all times.  It hurts the integrity of the Pac-man online community as a whole, and it's just plain wrong.  If you are caught wallhacking, we will ban your IP address.  However, again this great big inconvenient anachronism applies, so it's not really a big deal if we ban your IP address since they do not yet exist.  

HAPPY CHOMPIN'!