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I awoke clutching my chest. I couldn't breathe. The fibrosis was taking hold. I could feel the tendons stretching to break, to snap and collapse me. And when I looked down I saw, sitting like the Reaper on his steed, a cricket sitting on my chest. Scream. Or don't. I can't remember. But what we all do is swat and swat to push it away without rhythm or direction or purpose. I followed my natural instinct and by the time I was vertical at the bunk's bottom bedside I had tossed the cricket somewhere into the blackness. The tendons started to relax and I began to inhale and exhale, and things were collected. I turned back the covers. And beneath those covers lay a thousand crickets. When I watched Looney Tunes or old movies I laughed when characters fainted. I thought it was the most ridiculous thing in the world. How can a person be so distraught or shocked that their body thinks to shut off like a dehydrated runner at a mere thought or instance? Old women with big butts in fluffy dresses holding glasses to their face with a thin pole. Well I never! Thump. I remember the way down. I remember the dream, and the crickets, and the way down. They were on my legs. Up to my knees. A hundred more crickets crawling across my skin, making their way into my underwear, jumping and chirping and falling with me. I fainted so hard that I remember the thump. My Mother found me in the floor, motionless. I was bleeding from the head. Profusely as I remember it, barely as it happened. I told them about the crickets. I told them about Kevin and the turning and the popping and of my covers. My Father investigated and found nothing. Bread crumbs or a piece of lint. I wanted to faint and die. I didn't let that terror go. I made my Father keep watch over the next few nights. And to his surprise he did find a cricket. He found a few. There was a hole in the foundation beneath my bedroom floor and the insects came up through the cracks. I may have had a few in my bed after all. And if there were a thousand, I deserved it. I never understood crickets. Nobody understands crickets. You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand crickets. |