Cartoon
Captain Planet and the Planeteers
The New Adventures of Captain Planet

Animal
Well-prepared Team Leader

Outfit: Brian Bosworth's hair, dyed green / big fly eyeball on chest / Ultimo Dragon's ring gear

Tagline: "By your powers combined, I am CAPTAIN PLANET!"

Plot summary: Take a big clump of dirt and throw it into a swimming pool. Set that pool on fire, then blow on it. Did a silver magic Mark McGrath from a silver magic Sugar Ray manifest and clean up your mess?

"Captain Planet" is the best thing the anthropomorphic planet of Earth could come up with to combat the rise of pollution. Gaia (said anthropomorphia, who looks like Vanessa Williams instead of Globey from Pee-Wee's Playhouse like she should) couldn't even use her powers to make him specific. He's not "Captain Earth," he's Captain Planet. If she made a superhero who admired hubcaps and collected hubcaps, and all of his actions were direct and specific toward hubcaps, she'd call him "PROFESSOR ITEMS." But here he is, the product of what happens when five teenagers with magical rings do a group hug. They probably just could've punched the bad guys with their ring fists. (more)

User Comments: Hey, I like Earth Day as much as the next guy (I hate Earth Day), but Captain Planet has got to be the worst super hero of all time. Why? His sole purpose in life is to fight pollution. What is his only weakness? Pollution. "I'll stop you, Snobbish Dumpsalot or whoever! You'll never succeed in polluting the river! Wait, what is this, dirty water, noooooooooo"

Why did the Planeteers give up their rings to make this guy? The Asian girl could drop a tidal wave on your face. But no, they had to stand around for upwards of four minutes per episode, yapping about how awesome Planet is while he lays on the ground grunting with mud on his head. That pretty much makes him worse than every other hero, heroine, kid sidekick, wonder dog, or Mad Magazine parody of such in the entire world. I mean, I know Blecchman isn't going to be of much assistance in this war against broad social attitudes, but at least he'll never get his ass handed to him by a crying Indian.

User Rating: 4.0/10 (5 votes)