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**OnlineHost** You have entered the Atlanta Braves at San Francisco Giants chatroom. |
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LicenseToPills: hey buddy hey buddy hey hey hey |
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LicenseToPills: hey bitch the back of your head looks like a piece of shit |
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pedro_navidad: B-Barry? C'mon, man! Shouldn't you be heckling the batter? |
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LicenseToPills: put yourself in my shoes for a minute, i gotta stand here and somehow stare around your enormous broken-in ass so i can watch what's happening in the god damn ball game |
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LicenseToPills: meanwhile i have to figure out exactly how i'm gonna bail your ass out when you fuck up this ground ball |
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**OnlineHost** The ball has been hit to pedro_navidad. |
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**OnlineHost** pedro_navidad has booted the ball. |
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pedro_navidad: Jeez! God, Barry! Jeez! |
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LicenseToPills: oh my bad i'd like to apologize, i didn't know you were really gonna fuck up like that. had i known that i would have put battery acid in your best friend's contact lenses |
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pedro_navidad: Stop! Please! I would like you to stop! |
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LicenseToPills: you think i'm fuckin with you, you're gonna pay for that fuckup. next throw home goin straight to your dome |
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LicenseToPills: they'll say it's an accident but me and whatever's left of your sorry ass will know you paid the price and got busted up cause you couldn't stop gaying up the stadium with your horrible fielding |
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pedro_navidad: /fidgets |
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LicenseToPills: it ain't "if", it ain't even "when". it's "i'm gonna give you fuckin shaken baby syndrome for grownups" |
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pedro_navidad: /shivers |
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LicenseToPills: your pretty little mama's gonna find you dead of goddamn dead sleeping baby disease and then i'll kick your dad in the balls and show your mama a real man and make her forget you were born |
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LicenseToPills: then we'll have a child together and name him "pedro feliz" and he'll grow up to be worth more than a piss in the breeze |
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pedro_navidad: /covers face with glove, begins to cry |
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LicenseToPills: and you'll get to heaven and jesus will be like "i'm sorry i have no idea who you are, you seem cool but you haven't exactly been invited so it'd be cool if you could find your way out" |
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pedro_navidad: /inches away toward infield grass |
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LicenseToPills: and you'll spend eternity in hell with only satan and kal daniels to keep you company while me and your mom laugh at you |
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pedro_navidad: /urinates involuntarily |
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**OnlineHost** Third out, Atlanta takes the field. |
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AChipOffTheOl'_erJones: /charges grounder |
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**OnlineHost** AChipOffTheOl'_erJones has slipped on the grass in front of third base. |
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AChipOffTheOl'_erJones: whhHHHOOOOP |
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**OnlineHost** AChipOffTheOl'_erJones has sprained his knee and ankle. |
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AChipOffTheOl'_erJones: AAAGGH
/smells
Oh man, did I just slip in piss? |
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LicenseToPills: hahahahahaha fuck you chipper jones i hate the shit out of you |
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AChipOffTheOl'_erJones: Why me? |
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LicenseToPills: because last time i checked you don't have as many home runs as i do |
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AChipOffTheOl'_erJones: You could have just went up and kneecapped me or something. |
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LicenseToPills: i am unable to walk |
